Just Who Does SHE Think She Is

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Who IS this chick? This calculatingly cocky, positively presumptuous, seductively savage ball of feminine mystical brilliance!

You’re absolutely tired of her antics and a bit irked by your inner and uncontrollable  desire to remain enthralled within her aura, and see what she’s doing now. You can’t avoid women like this. They’re the movers and the shakers, the power players. They don’t actually create the controversy, but instead plant the seeds to get the harvest growing. You  painstakingly try to figure out how she so gracefully gets away with murder, not ever realizing that she never actually touches the gun…

Seriously though, again, who IS this chick and Just Who Does SHE Think She Is??

  • Who Does She Think She Is…always affirming her strength and aptitude.
  • Who Does She Think She Is…unapologetically going against the grain.
  • Who Does She Think She Is…living the life she was actually destined for.
  • Who Does She Think She Is…challenging the norm.
  • Who Does She Think She Is…rich and well-versed in her cultural identity.
  • Who Does She Think She Is…continuously overcoming adversity.

Who Does She Think She Is…and more importantly, Why Do You Care?

SHE is a Queen. She is unapologetic in her actions and her life choices. While needing no validation from her peers, she thrives in her own confidence and appreciation for every stride she makes. Her perspectives aren’t easily wavered, and her philosophies are usually based on fact rather than popular opinion. She’s regal in her demeanor and often exudes an intimidating disposition. She’s probably the sweetest girl in the room, but your worst nightmare during a questionable encounter. She isn’t afraid to speak her mind and silence your ignorance. Don’t ever misconceive her brief quiet moments for overall weakness. Remember, she is calculated. She’s fierce at chess and knows precisely how to play each move. She’s often even-tempered and indifferent, but never unaware or naive. She’s a force to be reckoned with in her professional endeavors, and makes moves inaudibly, leaving her adversaries in utter unforeseen awe upon each accomplishment. Her explicit personality has no room in her romantic relationship. While she demands the utmost respect from her mate, she’s delicate enough to know when submission is necessary; hence the fact that she actually has a good relationship. Trust is entertained quite loosely with her, as she has lived life enough to know that most hit dogs will holler. She’s mysterious yet colorful, and says the things that most will only think. Her transparency is refreshing and intriguing, as it becomes puzzling to see a woman of her stature not be perfect. Her children are off-limits to egregious nonsense, and violation of this rule is the quickest way to find yourself on the other side of her hell. She welcomes healthy debate and psychotically feeds off of your growing frustration to her lack of surrender. Her beauty is astonishingly exquisite, as she separates herself from norm ideals and probably embraces her natural attributes. She reads more than she watches tv and her man admires her intellect. She isn’t a huge fan of mainstream merriment, and you’ll probably find her on the opposite side of trendy social sensibilities. She’s just different.

You see, SHE is the woman we all strive to be. The woman that is inherently within all of us but only some have successfully mastered her revealing. She isn’t the everyday woman and doesn’t desire to be…So it isn’t about who she Thinks she is. It’s about who she Knows she is; and you presumably want to be just that…

 

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Why I Won’t Subscribe to Your ‘Angry Black Woman’ Cliché

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My role models are a bit different. They aren’t your typical everyday mainstream media household names. While I do appreciate me some Dangerously in Love, Bey Hive has never quite given me the profound inspiration to do much more than dance around my living room in my boy shorts while I Swiffer. No shade to those that have found a soul mate in her, but I am just not that one. While I commend many of our most celebrated and popular celebrities for their success and community contributions, I sit and enviously gaze at a higher plateau of divine being. I’m talking about the Assata Shakur, Angela Davis, Erykah Badu, Nikki Giovanni, Nina Simone, Folorunsho Alakija, Toni Morrison, Iyanla Vanzant, Fannie Lou Hamer, Gwendolyn Brooks type of woman! There is one common entity that make these women noteworthy to me. They all come from a different breed of Black woman. The Black woman who is strong and intense. The Black woman who is passionately opinionated. The Black woman who is educated. The Black woman who is cultured. The Black woman who knows her rights. The Black woman with a story to tell. The Black woman who will make you know and respect her struggle. The Black woman who speaks her mind and fiercely collides with injustice. The Black woman who goes against the grain. The Black woman whose aura lets you know that she’s not the one to mess with…The Black woman who is totally Unapologetic for it all.

All too often our Black women are placed into quite unattractive categories because of our strength. If we talk too loud, disagree too often, curse more than twice in one sentence, are overly confident, or willing to put someone in their place, we are given that dreaded title as the “Angry Black Woman.” I am not here for that load of crap, nor will I ever be! Society has its very strategically oppressive way of diminishing the Black woman’s power, and we continue to let this fly. Each time you hide in the shadows and allow that Queen to fight alone, or worse, judge her because you don’t think her behavior is “lady like” or “appropriate,” you have further encouraged the propagation of our sisterhood decline.

So what’s your real issue with the women who aren’t afraid to possibly ruffle some feathers? Could it be perhaps that she says all of the magically brilliant notions already floating in your little taboo brain? Or maybe you can’t understand how she’s able to get away with such a defiantly honest temperament. I know what it is. It eats you Up inside that this woman is still able to gracefully coexist in a World that constantly tells her she needs to keep her mouth shut and just go along to get along!! Here’s the thing though: You aren’t getting very far traveling in the same rush hour traffic that everybody else is driving in as well. Get it yet?? Shakur’s publication, Assata: An Autobiography, is a literary masterpiece and pretty much changed my life! Her courage, calculated persistence, and lethal tongue lashings gave me a firm sense of super Black girl self-empowerment! They don’t make women like this anymore, and if they do, we don’t celebrate them as cultural icons. We shun them for stepping out of their place.

Of course I can’t address the issue of the feared and resilient Strong black woman without mentioning her said role in her romantic relationships. Again, the types of women I’m talking about are scarce. The backbone is detached and has been replaced by the pseudo Perfect Patty, love-starved weakling who is simply happy to have a man. You all know who I’m referring to. The girlfriend of yours that you want to back hand because she can’t seem to find her own brain functioning in between his cerebral cogitation. She’s lost without his “insight” and has no clue as to the contents of her own identity. She’s the sister friend that won’t remove her weave or wear her hair in its natural state because her man says he doesn’t like ‘nappy’ hair.  She doesn’t drink more than one glass of wine while at dinner because he thinks she’s had enough. She narrows her list of those she is allowed to befriend because he doesn’t want her hanging around, and being influenced by, us strong ones with a big mouth. 😉 You get where I’m going with this — Just as no life is worth living when you relinquish the innate potential to be yourself, neither is any relationship worth participating in where someone is dangling your puppet strings! Just my opinion, but what do I know?

Last but certainly not least, a huge reason why you won’t catch me buying into society’s Euro-saturated version of what I should be is because of the future! Specifically, the futures of the two little Kings that are from my womb. I owe them, at minimum, that regard of being an image of the formidably grounded, audacious Black woman that they will need to have by their sides one day! With all of the struggles facing our Black men these days, there is nothing more important than the strength and awareness of the woman watching his back!

So remain secure in your impression, purposeful in your efforts, and forthright in your delivery. You never know when you’re being that voice and energy that someone needs. As my Granny always used to say…“Those that mind don’t matter, and those that matter don’t mind!”